It doesn't sound threatening to me but there are a couple typos what could hurt your credibility :-).
Good luck in resolving the issue.
I immediately contacted your business upon return, and the service representative stated that the cancellation fee would be waived. The phone was promptly returned to your store.
The legal counsel of the JAG Corps of the Army has conducted an investigation into this matter, and we have learned that your profits are nowhere near the $250 you claim per line. Since the phone has been returned in it's original condition, the price of the phone cannot be included. This is considered to be price gauging. I will be following up with a complaint to the BBB. I have already filed a complaint with T-Mobile, and they are following up with their own investigation of your companies' practices.
Please contact me at 315 681If I do not receive a call back within xx days/weeks, I will be forced to take further action.".
Keep it simple. Give them a concrete time frame to work with, and be reasonable. If you are going to mail it, allow time for postal mail. If by email, I would say about a week or so. The above should help make it a little more clear and to the point...
Did you return the phone within 14 (or 30) days? Often there is a period of time in which one can cancel a cell phone plan / return a cell phone with little to no cost (excludes restocking fees that may still be charged, especially by resellers). What does the contract say?.
Are you in California? -if so, there may be additional legal protections.
Did the T-Mobile reseller charge you any restocking fees? ... or are you only being charged the $250 for cancellation of service?.
Who is charging you the $250 ... T-Mobile or the reseller? ... from what you wrote, it sounds like the reseller is ... is that correct?.
Try to contact the reseller again, and demand they credit back the $250 promptly ... or you will file a charge back, file a complaint (regarding the local reseller) with the BBB, and your state's Attorneys General.
If filing a charge back - explain you returned the phone because it didn't work, and that the reseller took the phone back - you didn't cancel the service, the reseller did, in effect, when they took back the phone.
Are you overseas in Germany? using the on post phone shops?.
If so, dont forget your ICE card to AAFES this happened to a sgt buddy of my a few weeks back, he cancelled the phone within a week because of bad service and they billed him $170 - he kicked up a mess here with aafes and they got him a full refund.
Good luck buddy (if you are oversea's I'm in Grafenwoehr!)..
Contact T-Mobile asap. Their resellers are bound to certain terms.
You should also be able to file a chargeback with your credit card to dispute the charge...